yOu gUys dOn'T knOw wHo yOu aRE

yOu gUys dOn'T knOw wHo yOu aRE

but you are the very ones who chatted with me JUST now. although you don't know what's happening, you all have made me cheer up at least a little, all the same.

thanks guys. all three of you. =)

little keys can open big locks. small words can express great thoughts.

mEmOriEs

mEmOriEs

some memories stay happy,

some hurt like crazy.

so much that you would have wished it never existed.

but the irony is, if the sad memories did not exist in the first place, you would not know which are the happy ones.

i once said, "without sadness, there's nothing like happiness."




get away from me. the closer you are, the further i retreat.

=(

no matter how strong i try to be, just what are those things rolling down my cheeks?

i HatE tHe wHOlE wOrLd

i HatE tHe wHOlE wOrLd

I HATE THE WHOLE FUGGING WORLD BECAUSE I LOST MY HANDPHONE POUCH THAT I HAD JUST BOUGHT YESTERDAY AFTERNOON FROM JURONG POINT AND MY MOMO BOUGHT IT FOR ME ONE OK I AM SO SAD LA I THINK I DROPPED IT ON THE BUS BECAUSE SOMEONE CALLED ME ON MY WAY TO SCHOOL AND I ACTUALLY ABSENT-MINDEDLY LEFT IT ON THE SEAT @#^&^$%#$#@$ I HAD IT FOR ONLY LESS THAN 24 HOURS AND I LOST IT. I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW STUPID I AM. OK I AM VERY PISSED NOW.

I HAVE BOUGHT A NEW SIMILAR POUCH BUT THE COLOUR IS DIFFERENT SO I AM STILL QUITE SAD BECAUSE MY MOMO BOUGHT IT FOR ME AND I LOST IT SO I AM STILL VERY VERY PISSED BUT I WANT TO SAY THANKS TO NICOLE AND NOORIN WHO BACKTRACKED WITH ME FROM THE LIBRARY ALL THE WAY TO THE BUS STOP OPPOSITE AND THANKS TO SZE GAB AND CLEMMIE WHO WENT WITH ME TO BUY THE POUCH. OK I HAD ENOUGH OF COMPLAINING BUT I MIGHT JUST COMPLAIN MORE WELL YOU NEVER KNOW. >.<

I HATE THE WHOLE WORLD. -_-

fReE tAu hWaY

fReE tAu hWaY

yesterday i was still lamenting to myself that why the hell was i staying home on a saturday night. precisely why? i had nothing to do! argh!

but!! yay! kian asked me if i wanna go watch some live bands performing at the esplanade with teck soon! so i thought i might be able to watch fireworks live from esplanade! yippee!

but, while i was at newton (on my way to city hall meeting him and teck soon), i saw the fireworks. -_- that meant i wasn't able to catch them over at esplanade, coz by the time i reached there, it ended. argh!!

then 3 of us watched these live bands performed.. they were not bad, i would have been intrigued by the drummers, if not for the sweltering heat last night. what a spoiler. after the first performance, we went to buy candy floss.. teck soon tried to bluff auntie with a 50 cents malaysia coin! so bad! but aunty clever, she saw through our plan.. she came after us! LOL. we walked over to fullerton hotel, JUST TO USE THE TOILET. there were a lot of policemen around, because the NDP preview had just ended at that time.. so you can imagine how much people were at city hall.. but the walk was worth it, coz the toilets were damn grand. haha! yeah i know, toilets only. >.< then we walked around the hotel (there was this wedding going on, Andrew & Jean, is it??) wanted to crash in, haha, kidding. no way man, in slippers and shorts? errrr...

then we walked back and watched the second band performed.. this band was better, Dancing Nancies, are they? oh well, my mind was only pondering about my tau hway. wanted to eat that badly! so we went off at about 10.30pm and took bus, and walked, and took bus and walked, before we finally ended up at the famous tau hway shop at GEYLANG!! nice!! and the guys ordered taiwan mian xian.. it tasted better if you take the yew char kuay to 'oon' the mian xian's gravy. haha! by the end of the meal i was quite full la, don't know why.. i even gave half of my yew char kuay to kian leh! and clever KIAN. SOMEHOW we got free supper! free tau hway! free tau hway zui! free yew char kuay! free taiwan mian xian! should have ordered more.. dumplings, guo tie, chao bing..

then we walked around to see hookers. this time, there were lesser. perhaps it's because of the installation of police cameras.. but as usual there were quite alot of sleazy guys around la.. BUT HOR, WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ONE WALKING IN FRONT HUH! i thought you all should be the ones wanting to see! then we came across this sex toys shop.. at first i didn't want to go in, but i don't want to be left alone outside the shop (those chi ko peks!)! so no choice, i was the first one to step in the shop! hahahahaha! went in to have a look. i shy ok. i pretended to buy drinks. but did not buy any in the end. HAHA. but now i realised.. sex toys are VERY expensive. they cost like a few hundred bucks?! =.=

it was like 12.30am.. then kian said "i think your last bus is gone." -_- i thought i would have to spend money on cabs again.. but HENG ah! they waited with me for about ten minutes to see if there was any chance that my bus would come trotting along at that time.. and teck soon's good eyesight saw my bus 21!! saviour! haha! so i happily took my last bus home while they continued their search... errrr... for the way home. =)

and i just have to say: i got this super cute hp pouch today!! =D you guys will see it soon!! hehe.

conclusion: free supper makes me HAPPY! =D

bIg Big rAin!

bIg Big rAin!

went to ssdc yesterday evening to help nicole book her basic theory, also to accompany the donkey and josh to book theirs. but alas, nicole has to go down personally as they'll have to check her eyesight. now, did i have my eyes checked the last time? seriously, i can't remember. and i haven't seen ah black for a while! a while = quite a few months, i think more than a year? i can't remember.. memory is failing me. drats. but one big discovery, he is still as black. =P and to think he told me he was fair when he was still a baby! i don't believe that. =X then we went over to novena to eat hans! stupid donkey. kept complaining and insisting that we took a cab. waste money! but somehow i wondered why ah black and i didn't agree since donkey was treating. wasted! but hey, we helping you to save money ok! >.<

so we took mrt, and hans was not good. just that the garlic bread tasted like a cookie, instead of those fluffy bread. you bite, KRAK! get the point? haha, and my pork chop was super hard to cut la, to the extent that i dropped my fork. oh well, =X however, donkey's lamp chop seemed worse. as he was cutting, it seemed that he was having a fit or something. =P ah black's grilled fish is errrrrr... tasteless. =X

then we went to wait for a cab where there was a duper long queue! yar lar, donkey insisted!!! argh. and when my bus came, stupid donkey covered my eyes. i only saw it when my bus moved away. but since i have free ride, so why not. forgive you. haha. the irony WAS when my bus came for the second time, we still had not got a cab! =.= so we waited, and waited, and waited. like finally!!!!!... =O

eee donkey. i've done my part huh! now it's your turn! better buy me my hans, marche, fish & co and BK breakfast! i shall report to you once i get my results and you better not eat your own words. ^.-

yippee!! driving in the BIG BIG rain today was fine, surprisingly! eunos that area was like, flooded? =D

i didn't have much help from my instructor, i thought he was in this half-hibernating state. -_- the aircon in the car was freezing cold and no matter where i shift the little fans, they still blew towards my right fingers which were already numb from the cold la. so i suo xing offed the aircon. not the whole, but there's this knob that you can adjust the magnitude of the particular window where the air is blowing out from. OH WELL, if you know WHAT i'm talking about. i'm lazy to explain. *_*

but before i went for driving, i was in school at 9am SHARP ok! i even missed 2 buses on purpose, so that i could get to school on time, NOT EARLIER. but alas! i sat in canteen one, reading my i zhou kan (because got derrick hoh! so i buy! HAHA!) until i felt that, the more i read, the longer i was waiting. i took a glance at my watch. KNS! 9.35am liao. still no one here! #$%#%$#%$#.. so i called hongvan, whom i thought was the most possible one to be at least a BIT more punctual.. =X.. annnndddddd heng ah, she was already in the library cafe since 9.15.. see? my instinct was correct la. come to me people, next time i help you tell your fortune, maybe i can earn big bucks from it. =E

soon nicole and kim came! and started work. cut up all the writings, choosing the colours for the papers and started arranging.. but by 10.30am i had to leave for my driving lesson as it was supposed to start at 11.30am and i needed about an hour to get to eunos.. i wish there were less butt-ache on the bus journey. it was terrible. thank gawd i still had my magazine which i brought it along with meeeeee!! hahaha!

and while i was on the roads, my instructor picked up a call and said in teochew, "yeah we will be done by 1pm.. you come and fetch her from eunos mrt?" i was thinking who was that when he told me the caller was my dad.. apparently dad tried to call me, but i set my phone to silent mode because i do not like phone calls to distract me while i was driving la. i'm still quite novice yeah? =) so he called my instructor instead.. clever move i must say, haha. BUT, i was going back to school and i can perfectly take a straight bus back to school. so why was he still coming to pick me up? perhaps it's because of the big rain. T_T

but i didn't want to ask my instructor to call my dad to cancel his picking-me-up plan, cause i could go back to school myself and he could have saved the hassle, but on the other hand, i was quite reluctant to ask my instructor to call my dad, coz it's like.. WEIRD? oh well. so my dad did come (and mum came too) and picked me up, but i told him i was going back to school and i wondered why you all came in the first place? i guessed they wanted me to have lunch with them but my project mates were still waiting for me in school so i couldn't just leave them there. -sigh- i could see mum was slightly disappointed that i can't have lunch with them.. and i hate to see that happen at times.. =(

then i decided to ask dad to go to kap mac drive-thru so that i could get a quick lunch.. called nicole to ask if she wanted any but she didn't want.. so i just da-bao-ed my own lunch and brought to library.. actually i'm feeling kinda bad la, coz dad's like a chauffuer just now.. i hate it. i know their good intentions.. they didn't want me to be caught in the rain as they assumed that i was going home after my lesson.. ah, if only you all understand what i'm talking about.

and when i reached the library, nicole just had to tell me that they finished all the work and there was nothing much left because there's nothing we can do without a colour printer in school. -_-.. i should have gone for lunch with my parents.. but nicole was alone too coz hongvan left with her bf, kim left for fitness and noorin was still at her rehearsals.

never mind, i guess we'll just do what we can now, since noorin has joined us already.. perhaps come up with more designing! it's work again. tata!

*noorin just came back from finding some law books related to our project, or rather, ATTEMPTING to find, but she hasn't found ANYTHING.......... HAHAHAHAHA!!!! -why am i still so happy?! it's my project too, =.= -*

aiya, i don't know what's going on. =(

cOnfUsiOn

cOnfUsiOn

aiya don't bother to guess la. there are only 2 places where i can blog quietly; home or school. so if i'm not at home now (check out the time pls), that means i'm in school rite? haha. thanks to nicole's lappy. :)

i don't know why, but i'm feeling sian. ok, 'sian' is an understatement. i'm feeling more sian than sian. not projects, nor e learnings. i haven't completed fmgt's work though. sai. someone give me the answers please. i'll give you the credits instead.

supposed to be doing blaw report now, yeah we've done quite a substantial amount, and guess we're only left with printing and designing.. i assume if we can't finish it by today, we'll have to come back to school to finish it tmr coz monday's the deadline. but it's not really alot of work to do, so hopefully we can really get everything done by tomorrow.. then it'll be down to HRM report due next fri. =)

hmm, i don't understand why some people can be quite thick-skinned. one moment he lies, then he cheats, now he spins a tale. somehow i can only LAUGH about it. coz it's really funny. i'm not being sarcastic because i don't care much anyway, but telling someone that you said 'i like you' before, that you have broken up with your existing gf while you were in the middle of another courtship. ah well, sounds confusing, but it's kinda funny anyway. i mean, serious. dating a girl for one week and he says 'I love you'. HELLO?! I LOVE YOU when it's only one week? errr, too much info. haha, i'm prying into other people's business. but who cares. i like to gossip. =P haha, but i only gossip quality info la, come on.

looks like i did miss out on a number of activities, first the stayovers at clemmie's house, then the JB visit. but projects are around this corner, and i really don't want to incur my dad's wrath by returning home late at night, or worse, not coming home at all. he might just impose a curfew ANYTIME. it's not like there isn't one now, but at least there's nothing from me for him to pick on, so, i shall play it safe over here. i don't want to ruin my own chances of playing when my birthday is coming, although i thought he might give allowances for going home late for that particular reason. =)

right now, i just want to concentrate on my driving, and hope my instructor gets me an early test date, preferably before my PDL expires. can't wait to pass, coz that's a significant indication that i've grown up. i want to be able to say "hey! i can drive over!". as and when i like it. =D

i guess there are just times when you feel exceptionally lonely. seeing couples trying to get together, on the other side, you see couples trying to get away from each other. oh what an irony. why is it that when love turns sour, nothing's memorable anymore? the one that you were once so close to, yearn to be be with, yet is now the one you are trying damn fucking hard to run away from. whatever happened to all the sweet times you spent with each other? you would even quarrel with your parents over him/her. i can't find the answers to all my questions. but what the heck.

yet another bloke passed his driving. congrats dude, you won't see this anyway, haha. ah well, when will it be my turn! i can't wait. really.

somehow, there's just a point of time when i realise i'm over-worked and needs a rest badly. not physically, but mentally. that is something intangible and you don't even know where to start from. and worse still, sleeping does NOT help at all. i need some perks in my life. and for the past few weeks, i feel like i'm just floating with time, or by time.

ever since i've returned from the KL trip, there's really nothing memorable. perhaps i shall exclude baoc from that statement, because i'm glad i met some really nice friends.. like CHEN WEI AN. HAHAHA! ok la, not very nice also la. =P

aiya, i realise the more i'm writing, the more i'm crapping. and i bet half of you don't even understand what i'm writing about now. it's ok, it's meant to be confusing, coz that's exactly what i'm feeling right now. oh well, shall stop and let nicole have her lappy back, which means she's updating.. like finally!

why am i so bloody left out?

gOoDy gOod gIrl

gOoDy gOod gIrl

i can't believe how much housework i've done today. i remembered swearing and promising myself that i'd be a big pig today.. BUT!

i've done the laundry.

i've swept the floor.

i've mopped the floor.

i've ironed the clothes.

i've even MADE JELLIES!

gawd. damn fugging hardworking of me. not to forget applying face masks and doing my own nails. ahhhh, i'm a goody good girl!! =D

and, i've finished CMA, BLAW and ECD e learnings! i've also finished my part for BLAW report! i'm only left with FMGT! now, how much better can i get? WAHAHA!

now now!! tmr we're gonna do up our blaw report as much as possible!! =) then it's HRM report after that! argh. work and more work. but somehow i'm happy doing it. and i wonder why. -_-

i wonder how, i wonder why, yesterday you told me 'bout the blue blue sky...

4 e lEaRnIngs

4 e lEaRnIngs

so what if there're 4 e learnings? when tests are finally vanishing from my sight, projects and deadlines come trotting along my way.. so it doesn't really make my day in the end after all. -_-

there are only 3 lessons this week, HRM tutorial, HRM and BLAW lectures. -sighs- other than that, it's project almost everyday. AND and and (!!!!), i realise i have to study for CMA test 2 on my birthday. get it right. I HAVE TO BLOODY STUDY FOR A BLOODY SUBJECT'S BLOODY TEST ON MY BLOODY BIRTHDAY!! damn. horror of horrors. or rather, 'happiness of happiness''. =(

oh well, grimacing does not solve the problem. problem is, i so so so do not want to study for a test on my birthday. i'd rather have the test before it. BUT, before that it's project deadlines. so neither way works. ah, i don't know what i'm talking about already. :-(

nostalgia seems to be a part of me.

cRankY

cRankY

a couple of things that i will be very happy about! =D

1.


i will be very happy if i have this! DELUXE EDITION OK?! *prances around*


2.


and i will be even happier if i have THIS! oh my gawd!!


3.


she's in she's IN!!!!


4.


he's in he's IN!!! elation totally sets in! =)))


5.


hahaha! nothing beats this!

*credits to mediacorp for photos. i dun want to be charged for plagiarism. >.< *

and for those during baoc, who slept your time away in the convention, you missed a superstar in the making ok?! >.<

i can't wait for my dad to get a digital cam so that i can really start to photo-whore. not a very nice word to use though. hmm, i revise, so that i can start to be a full time narcissist. *_*

haha, driving in the circuit, doing the S courses and cranked courses had left me kinda cranky. but it was really fun, except that everything just felt so small in there. guess i'm used to driving on the main roads but not in the small circuit. can't even go up to the second gear! my gawd, =( and it's really funny to see some really new beginners and novice drivers going up kerbs and all. HAHAHA! (note: not sarcasm ok, it's really funny) ^.^

but i guess that's the difference between private students and school students. school students learn from the circuit first, so those that you see in the circuit are really novice drivers. and if they go out to the main roads they'll find the roads very big coz compared to those, the roads in circuit are really small! whereas for private students, we have to learn from the main roads so we face big challenges right from the start. i still remembered for my virgin lesson in driving, i only went round the carpark for 3 times then i was forced to drive out to the main road le. kinda scary. big lorries and all. you'd wish they never exist. but when you're used to the big roads and go into the circuits, you feel suffocated. spaces are so small. LOL. but the carpark lots are damn big! so it's easy to park anyway! =D

so many e learnings next week! guess i'll have to devote the time to BLAW project. -sigh- when tests are gone, projects come along. =( can't wait for the time when i can finally enjoy!!

isn't the weather great, big sun yet big rain. the wind is so strong that it blew me away. not literally though. how nice if you can enjoy this cooling weather, wear a pullover and hug a cup of hot coffee in your hands to warm yourself, then enjoy the beautiful rain outside. how nice.*smitten*


"how nice if you receive a lil hug every morning you wake up."

indeed. *_*

kIDs iN sIngApOrE

kIDs iN sIngApOrE

sometimes i feel that i'm over-privileged. did i just spell that wrongly? pardon me. the killer blaw paper yesterday has just left me pretty traumatised.

anyway, i was really really supposed to wake up early on wed to study blaw. oh well, i did wake up well before the time i was supposed to meet nicole, but THAT GIRL woke up only at about 9.50 i guess? hahs. things tests can do to us. you can't imagine.

me: i don't feel like studying today. why not let's go..

she: LET'S GO K!!!!

the next moment, i found myself readily agreeing to her. i had wanted to say the exact same thing. we just have the knack of saying the same things at one time. dun try to test. it comes naturally. I HAVE NO IDEA WHY! guess we're just craving for some form of relaxation since the THREE taxing tests are over. even stoning at home is great. really. minus the part of endless housework duh. then the NEXT moment i found myself buying 5 pairs of earrings. ah. spending money. not that i have too much to spare. ever heard of retail therapy? that helps. big time! =D

that, resulting in me not studying at all for the whole day. well, who can when you've sang for like, 5 hours straight? i was already quite exhausted. thus it was on thurs when i really started blaw. err well, we were supposed to meet at 10am again, but she happily slept till 11.50? haha. i woke up earlier ok?! much earlier, thanks to my alarm clock, hehe. but me and mavis slacked. now i know. if you wanna meet nicole, better give her a call or send her a sms to check if she woke up already. you don't want to wait one hour in vain. HAHAHA. =P but the gist is, we did studied anyway, and she got so pissed coz i was going crazy from all the notes that i didn't exactly understand, and started being lame. meaning, crapping and talking rubbish and trying to distract her for studying. haha. sorry gal, can't help it. =X

fri was the ultimate. went to school early again to run for the last lap. not literally, but as in to cheong some last minute work. paper started at 4pm, i was already in school at 12pm. this is bad. i've getting giddy spells and headaches often recently. it's the stress or what? no idea la. panadol's been good though. i'm popping it in so much that i can sing 'Get It Poppin'. okie, not funny. but still, will someone help me do a research on what makes someone gets giddy spells, migraine, and headaches WHENEVER THERE IS HOT SUN. thanks. i'll love you to bits.

the paper sucked, the subject sucked. oh i revise, the subject SUCKS. half the time i don't know what i'm reading, in addition, i don't know what i was writing. all i know i was into only qns 16 part a, 2nd para, and i saw people leaving the exam hall already. i consoled myself, those that left duper early, either they are damn clever, or damn stupid. why? because either they know how to do, or they don't know how to do, so they gave up. then i realised i was digressing. so my mind floated back to my paper, and continued to pen away furiously. no idea whether it's right or wrong though. i was so concentrated that i didn't even notice mavis getting up and leaving her seat. she was sitting in my direction of 10 o'clock. whatever. i finished my paper just 5 minutes before the designated time, and spent the last 5 minutes looking around at people. some gave a smirk. some gave a stoned face. some was still writing away furiously. some totally gave up and slept on their tables. -sigh- i repeat. the things tests can do to us. they drain our lives away. =(

then i recalled. i remember reading somewhere that kids from other countries, their greatest fears were naturally natural disasters. gawd, can't believe my english deteriorated to THAT extent. for eg, kids in japan feared being killed or squashed in earthquakes. kids in indonesia now, feared being swept away in tsunamis. totally understandable. kids in singapore?! their greatest fear is 'failing exams'. goodness! i almost fell off my chair upon hearing that. are we too safe that we simply do not think about the danger that lurks around us? are we TOO meritocratic that we only care about results and nothing else? not even our own lives? sure, we are surrounded by small little islands of our neighbouring countries so that kinda protects us. but pls do not forget. our safety is secured at the expense of the thousands who died. so please. if someone asks you what your greatest fear is, at least say something more sensible. not i scared of failing my exams! if not my parents will kill meeee! *rolls eyes*

oh, i digressed.

after the paper, i went for a wonderful dinner with anthea and xian though. newton food is simply YUM YUM. we were duper full, but i was still craving for roti john! i haven't eaten that in ages!! but i did not buy it in the end. had enough time waiting for anthea's food. haha, she alwaya tabao home for her bro! we were quite appalled at the amount of food her bro can eat. it's kinda scary. =/

oh yeah. as to why i feel that i'm over-privileged? sigh. i blog-hopped past so many blogs, seen so many people listing 'to learn driving' on their crave lists or wish lists. i have the chance to do that exactly, yet i dread it at times. yes, i dread driving at times. it sucks away my concentration, my energy, my time, and most importantly, my dad's money. yeah, although it's one or two times a week, but it still chalks up to a hefty sum of money. one lesson is $36, two lessons amount to $72. and if my instructor books circuit lessons for me, it's yet another additional $22 per hour. like what the heck. it's fugging expensive that i think it's worth the money to spoil the amenities in there man. like kicking the stupid traffic lights, knocking and ramming the parking poles. =/ and i'm gonna spend another $58 in just a measly one and a half hours at 3pm later? -_-" i don't even earn two folds as much!

yay! it's gonna be my fave tam yam soup from the coffeeshop near farrer park mrt for lunch. hehe. i love it. =)

stupid donkey! you said it! 65 and above. i'm gonna eat-all-i-can. YOU!! watch out. =P

and derrick hoh GOT IN!!! kelly got in too! my gawd. nicey day for me, that was. both my fave male and female singers are into the semis! yippee!!

*back from lunch* sometimes a nice simple lunch with your parents is really nice although there's gonna be a wallet-tearing driving lesson later on. *smiles* and i wonder what is the beeg problem with blogger. it reverts to and fro in between eng and chinese. oh well, i'm bilingual. so what's the big fuss. *slaps forehead*

it's all about you. ain't it? >.<